B. S. I Love You

Paul Bongard is a young advertising producer who has just completed shooting his first big commercial for Regal Cola. On the flight back to New York, he flirts with a lovely young woman who insists that her name is Marilyn Monroe. Although she at first spurns him, she soon aggressively invites him to have sex with her in the lavatory. Later, at his office, Paul learns that because he did not film the exact script he had written for the commercial, he has been taken off the account. Paul's boss, Mr. Harris, urges him to resign, but Paul refuses and, when his office is taken away, moves his desk into the hallway. At home, Paul avoids calling his fiancée of six years, Ruth, who lives in Connecticut near his doting parents. Instead he goes to a bar with his friend and colleague Ted, and is excited to see Marilyn there. She seduces him on the dance floor, but then screams and runs off, causing the people around them to assume that Paul molested her. Wandering the city streets, Paul recalls his naïvite upon first arriving in New York. He returns to his apartment and calls Ruth, but lies to her that he cannot visit because he will be traveling for another week. At work the next day, a sweating Harris pulls Paul into a bathroom stall, where he presses Paul to take the blame for an expensive gaffe in an account that Harris made. Although Harris offers Paul a glowing recommendation to the rival firm of Ink, Dreyfuss and Zimmerman, Paul refuses. Ted has been listening, and now advises him to take the offer. They go to a bar, and when Paul sees Marilyn, he follows her but she eludes him. He goes to his apartment, only to find Marilyn in his bed wearing a bikini. Although he angrily rebuffs her, she removes her top and they make love. Soon after, Paul decides to accept Harris' proposition, and he quickly lands the new job at Ink, a trendy young agency. Pleased, he informs Ruth, who is most happy because he has called her before his mother. When he mentions that he will not be able to visit all summer, she has to remind him that they are to be married on Labor Day. With a new stylish look, Paul quickly rises at the agency, and is noticed by director Jane Ink. She invites him to her swank apartment, where, despite his bumbling, she seduces him. Jane names Paul the producer on an important new campaign and takes him with her to the Los Angeles meetings, where he makes love to her and she shapes the campaign. Back in New York, Ted complains that Paul has become more nervous and insecure, and wonders if this signals that he has "made it." Paul goes to his apartment and, finding the door open, assumes Marilyn is back and so strips to his underwear. The intruder, however, is Ruth, and although she is suspicious of his nudity, they enjoy a happy day together in the city. He takes her to his office to show her the new campaign, a simulated race riot designed to "raise a charge." Ruth objects to it as offensive, asking if he could refuse to work on it. Paul chafes, but kisses her. Just then, Jane walks in and icily demands that Paul meet her at her apartment. Ruth, deducing that the two are having an affair, leaves, despite Paul's retort that he is "making it, and people don't care how." At Jane's that night, she introduces him to her daughter Michele, and when Paul sees that it is Marilyn, he faints. When Paul awakens, Michele insists on driving him home, and on the way demands that he stop seeing her mother. The next day, Paul and Jane arrive at the airport for another West Coast meeting. When Paul sees Michele run into the airport, he tries to catch her but is too late to keep her from revealing their relationship to Jane. Assuming his job is lost, he wanders home from the airport. Spotting his image in a store window, he suddenly realizes his love for Ruth and races home to call her. However, she informs him sadly that she is marrying another man. As he is leaving for Connecticut to try to dissuade Ruth, Paul receives a call from Jane, asking him to join her in Los Angeles, and he retorts, "You're disgusting. You're thirty-seven!" Unable to find a cab to drive him to Connecticut, Paul rents a car and speeds to his mother's, who tells him Ruth and her fiancé are taking a ship to England. He races to the pier, abandoning the car and running when he hits a traffic jam, but is too late. He watches morosely as the ship sails away, but when he turns around, he discovers Ruth, who decided at the last minute to stay. Together, they walk home.